I have a new roommate and I have mixed feelings about her.
Bella is lovely of course; any female I live with would have to be beautiful and she is. Brown hair with some highlights, long lean lovely legs, and the most gorgeous gold brown eyes. She is a bit underweight but it looks good on her and when she walks she wiggles her skinny little butt in the happiest way. Damn!
When we walked down to the park last night I could see that people were staring at us . . . plain ol' me and beautiful Bella. She is quite a looker!
I think the last man she lived with may have been a bit of an abuser- she flinches when I raise my voice or move too quickly toward her. I am learning to be very gentle so that I don’t frighten her. I am sure she will learn.
I met her through a policeman I know. He had rescued her from a pretty tough situation. He wouldn’t tell me much about it but it was clear that she had seen some bad times. Since he couldn’t take her home with his family he needed someone to take her in and treat her like a lady. He knows that I am single and pretty open minded he thought I might be the perfect man for her.
We get along so well. We play well, she likes my cooking, all the little treats I give her, and even though I am not always sure she understands what I am saying she listens intently and offers nothing but her support and affection. She seems to just adore me!
It does worry me though, how hard a time she has spending time alone. I like our time together, leaning on each other while I read or we watch TV but when I leave her at the house to go to work she cries and moans and becomes frantic with worry that I won’t come back . . . I have reassured her but it doesn’t seem to help. It does seem to help if I just put her in her bed and cover her with a blanket so that she doesn’t see the light . . . she whines a bit but eventually she drifts off to sleep. I wish she could just hang out at the house and enjoy the peace and the solitude without having to be shut away in the dark!
My poor neighbors have been so nice about the situation. The woman next door in my duplex wanted to reassure me that she could tell that Bella has a good heart and is very sweet; she even said that she was ok that Bella cried loudly enough that she could hear her through the common wall a bit. She is just sure that soon Bella will get comfortable living here and learn to trust me and will be just fine. I do hope so. I have already worked out where she can go if she doesn’t learn not to cry and bother the neighbors when I am gone. If we can just work through that issue I am sure we can work it out and have a long and pleasant relationship for both of us.
If it doesn’t work out, I have made some decisions about what I will be looking for next. Rather than trying to save her from an abusive past or helping her to work through her baggage I think the next time I will find a really young one. One without the bad habits- like they always say, "get em young and raise em up the way you want!" In fact, even if it does work out I think I may just go out and find a young one anyway! I have always wanted two at the same time and then when I am gone they can entertain each other! I love to watch a couple of young cuties play together!
I am also thinking that instead of a Pointer I think the next one should be a herder. Maybe next time it will be an Aussie Shepherd or perhaps a Rottweiler pup.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Friday, March 7, 2008
Right Now
I was in a hurry after all, it could have happened to anyone!
Driving home, busy afternoon, lots going on!
As I drive up to the house I end my cell phone call and jump out of the car and head into the home office and get to work. Letters to write, calls to make!
Hours go by and I pull on jeans to go meet a friend for a drink at a nearby tavern. Grab up my cell phone and can't find my keys . . . no problem, I probably just dropped them under the front seat like I often do.
As I walk around the front of the house the car is gone! Oh no!
Then I hear it running . . . and as I come around the corner, there it is! I did leave the keys in the car. In the ignition. With it running. With it in gear.
The car had gently pulled up the hill and stopped when it came to rest against the garage door.
Dang. I did it again.
Some years ago my wife was trying to explain why I drove her crazy and one of the examples I remember finding confusing was the fact that I didn't do things in order and worse yet, was often thinking of where I was going rather than of where I was. Her example was the way I got out of the car. There is a right way to do it? She explained that yes, you should park the car where you want it, put it in park, turn off the car, turn off the lights, take out the keys, pick up your "stuff", get out of the car, lock it, and walk away. Makes sense to me! I thought that was what I did!
Since then I have noticed how I got out of the car. I pull up to the parking place and once it is clear that I am going to make it I go ahead and get ready to go inside. First, I try to remember what I am going to do in there, then I open the car door, then so I won't forget- I lock it, hopefully sometime about then I remember to put the car in park and turn it off, I then try to pick up all my "stuff" and any other stuff that may be laying around. I then get out of the car and notice that I left the lights on. I then unlock the car and turn off the lights and then re-lock the car only to realize that when I leaned in to turn off the lights I set stuff down on the seat. That's ok though because I need to open the door to take the GPS off the dash anyway . . .
The problem is remembering to live in the now. Right now I am parking the car but that is so damned dull that my mind wanders and on top of that I am sure that I am capable of doing it so it isn't very interesting to do again so I don't and therefore I don't do it at all or at least not all of it.
Life is lived in the now.
That is so very hard. Thinking of this task and only this task and working through the steps and not skipping ahead and remembering to appreciate where I am instead of anticipating where I will be.
What am I doing right now? Who am I right now?
Right now.
Driving home, busy afternoon, lots going on!
As I drive up to the house I end my cell phone call and jump out of the car and head into the home office and get to work. Letters to write, calls to make!
Hours go by and I pull on jeans to go meet a friend for a drink at a nearby tavern. Grab up my cell phone and can't find my keys . . . no problem, I probably just dropped them under the front seat like I often do.
As I walk around the front of the house the car is gone! Oh no!
Then I hear it running . . . and as I come around the corner, there it is! I did leave the keys in the car. In the ignition. With it running. With it in gear.
The car had gently pulled up the hill and stopped when it came to rest against the garage door.
Dang. I did it again.
Some years ago my wife was trying to explain why I drove her crazy and one of the examples I remember finding confusing was the fact that I didn't do things in order and worse yet, was often thinking of where I was going rather than of where I was. Her example was the way I got out of the car. There is a right way to do it? She explained that yes, you should park the car where you want it, put it in park, turn off the car, turn off the lights, take out the keys, pick up your "stuff", get out of the car, lock it, and walk away. Makes sense to me! I thought that was what I did!
Since then I have noticed how I got out of the car. I pull up to the parking place and once it is clear that I am going to make it I go ahead and get ready to go inside. First, I try to remember what I am going to do in there, then I open the car door, then so I won't forget- I lock it, hopefully sometime about then I remember to put the car in park and turn it off, I then try to pick up all my "stuff" and any other stuff that may be laying around. I then get out of the car and notice that I left the lights on. I then unlock the car and turn off the lights and then re-lock the car only to realize that when I leaned in to turn off the lights I set stuff down on the seat. That's ok though because I need to open the door to take the GPS off the dash anyway . . .
The problem is remembering to live in the now. Right now I am parking the car but that is so damned dull that my mind wanders and on top of that I am sure that I am capable of doing it so it isn't very interesting to do again so I don't and therefore I don't do it at all or at least not all of it.
Life is lived in the now.
That is so very hard. Thinking of this task and only this task and working through the steps and not skipping ahead and remembering to appreciate where I am instead of anticipating where I will be.
What am I doing right now? Who am I right now?
Right now.
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